Musings and revelations created by me, Si_Phi, on my misguided adventure through life.
Wednesday, December 31, 2014
One year in...
I wanted to keep a journal of my thoughts and feelings throughout the year and summer resulted in a collapse of those. John and I had a falling out over something stupid, but he seems very embarrassed about the events that lead up to our not talking and I am a little stubborn.
Honestly, I don't care about what happened. You're a good man John. Foolish, maybe a little naive, and definitely overly trusting, but a good man all the same. I hope we'll repair things because I do miss you.
If you read this, we need to talk sometime. Also, my Dota stack is always open.
Classes were hard, but I passed them all somehow maintaining a 3.47 GPA this semester. I don't know how I did it, I thought for sure that with a 42% midterm average in linear algebra that I would get a C, but I got a B- in the class. Purdue and grade curves, good grief.
It is starting to look like I won't be completing a film minor if I want to also get a nuclear engineering minor. I'm going to take film classes for the rest of my general education credits, but I am already looking at a few summer semesters or a potential 'victory lap' semester. I really have no idea what I am doing when it comes to planning out the next two and a half years.
I'm going to Chicago to hang out with Brie, Stephan, Brian, and maybe Kendall if she can get out of work before going back to school. My mum and dad don't seem pleased, I know they miss me and I miss them dearly, but its a good chance to go see the windy city with friends. I'm not sure what we'll do there, maybe go to the museums or see a show. It'd be nice to catch a musical I haven't seen in some time.
My parents are getting weary of the Vermont weather. It's cold and my dad loses blood flow to his extremities. He really doesn't seem to happy and work is starting to wear on him.
Finally, I am addicted to Puzzle and Dragons. I need to stop paying for stones, that is my new years resolution! NO MORE IN APP PURCHASES!!!!
Peace out 2014!
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
It's been a while
School has been hard on me this semester. I'm no 4.0 student, but it was nice sitting comfortably above a 3.5 at the end of last year. Now that looks like its going to be gone and with it my scholarship (if my semester GPA is below a 3.0). RIP my wallet.
I haven't played nearly as much Magic: the Gathering, nor have I played much Dota 2 for that matter. School work has started to consume my life. I don't mind this because Aerospace engineering, despite the challenge, is what I want to be doing. I want to design rockets. I've known this for several years now.
It's funny, when I used to play EVE: Online my Grandmother came to visit and asked me: "Is this what you want to do with your life?" Indirectly my answer is yes. I want to work in the space industry, I want to design rockets, I want to fly space ships. She's gone now, but I hope she knows that my obsession for EVE stemmed from my love for space.
I don't plan on getting to deep tonight. I have a project to do and an exam to study for tomorrow. Such is life. Also a project to continue working on. Bah. AAE251 I want to beat you so badly, but its hard.
Sunday, July 27, 2014
Living with John (I'm back)
So it's been a strenuous the two months since I last posted. In addition to figuring out my own troubles, which fortunately have been minor, I have been absolutely exhausted after living with my friend John.
John, if you ever read this, I hope my frustrations don't hurt you.
It's been very different living with John, as opposed to being friends who hang out or talk a bunch. Having to suddenly share a majority of my home time with John, time I valued because I could spend a majority of it alone, is not what I wanted from this summer. I realize that given the context of his suicidal intentions a few months prior it is petty and selfish. He's even left me well alone, never truly intruding. But I also feel the hosts obligation to always attempt to include him when in the summer I hang out with a much different crowd of people, a group he understandably feels awkward around because he doesn't know most of them. I'm loud, I party, I'm wild, and I'm free. I let loose in the summer where during the school year I am a bit of a prude. It's hard to include JT when he knows me as I am at school, rather than in the summer.
It's hard. I hope you'll forgive me for this summer JT.
Monday, May 26, 2014
First Outside Bouldering Day!!
There are a lot of climbing spots to choose from, but we started at the first one we found along the road. The routes were pretty chalky when we got there, so there is clearly an established group of people who climb these rocks. The one dry face of the boulder we were working on was probably a V1. It wasn't a difficult ascent and both of us got it after about 3 tries. I couldn't nail the start, but then again we were in a rush to beat the rain that was starting. We then moved on and practice heal hooks on a rail climb. It was a route easy enough to just do pull ups on while dangling our feet, but we both wanted to practice our hooks. We also fell a few times. Our last stop for climbing was at a great rock with about 4 different routes to choose from. We had just given up on the last rock due to rain but this rock was sheltered. Still, topping out proved nearly impossible because of the damp and drizzle, I lost my grip and took an unanticipated fall, but besides that the routes were fun and a bit of a challenge. V2-V3 range. We did find a boulder outside of our ability (probably V4-5) but we still messed about on it before moving on to the last rock.
If you're in Vermont for the weekend or live here and are looking for a great place to boulder this summer (for free!), the Notch has some great spots and boulders. Just bring a pad, because the local shops that rent bikes, roller blades, and other gear don't have any bouldering pads for sale/rent. Outdoor climbing wasn't too different from gym climbing, which shouldn't surprise me as much as it did, but it was definitely more fun. Climbing is great.
PS. If any of my terminology is confusing or wrong, I'm a new climber and still don't know what most holds are called. I have my words to describe, but they may not mean the same to another climber.
Friday, May 23, 2014
The Dota 5 Stack
It's been a while since I've played with a five stack. I usually solo que or play with my best friend JT or a guy I know named Reed. Yesterday that changed. We got 5 people in the mumble server we invade and played a few games. JT has decided his niche is hard support and a gent named Gork liked to support too. This allowed for Reed to go hard carry, myself to take mid, and our fifth, Reptar, to play solo offlane. We pretty much rolled.
Anywho, a couple hours later we played another set of games, except I played a hero I wasn't comfortable with and it basically cost us the game. However, after that we played two more finishing with an hour long game where I played bear and ate things. Lots of things. I had a beyond godlike streak of 14 kills. However, their PL was able to farm in the window of us pushing down top and middle and managed to extend the game a good thirty minutes. We had two sets of barracks, but could not for the life of us catch the PL. He had decent micro skills and got an early heart so it was hard to tell which PL was the real one and the illusions kept splitting and acting like they were dopple-walking. At first our supports were to scared to get a gem and our Pudge was dealing with 600 ping, but because our lanes were constantly pushed Pudge got a heart fairly easily and managed to acquire flesh heap stacks slowly but surely as we ganked everyone besides PL. At one point, we had 20-30 sentry wards across our side of the map, which made us realize a gem was much more practical. They couldn't kill pudge anyway. My bear couldn't do much in the late game, nor could venge. We could get kills, but catching PL was so time consuming and I was so afraid of not having buyback that my items descaled. I should have gotten a skadi when I had 6000 gold but I went for the cheaper buy of satanic and saved for buyback. After we got the gem, however, we killed PL 4 times before we could end it. He bought back twice, and we got the last tier 4 with 3 seconds left on his respawn. After that it was BKB pops and whack the ancient and hope enough of us stayed alive. It was a damn good game.
I guess the overarching point of this was that I had more fun in 4 games of Dota, playing as a five stack, than I have in all my other games. The gents I played with were cool, didn't mind my picks, were open to anything, and polite. I feel like I'm the douche bag because the one game I played support I fucked up. If you are frustrated with Dota, make friends. Find a group of people who play often, are fun to play with, and don't mind playing any role. You'll have a shit ton of fun.
That's all for now on Dota. I've been home for the last two weeks, my plans for going cross country have fallen through because JT won't be able to get is license in time for us to make it to Colorado. I'm a bit sad about that, but it is what it is. I'll be getting a job at the elementary school until camp starts, because they need substitutes for the last few weeks. It'll be weird, but it pays well.
Adios.
Friday, May 9, 2014
Semester One is Over
I think I am afraid that I am going to be bored this summer. Really, really bored. I am a bit afraid of what I will do when I am bored. Will I smoke? Will I do some things I'll regret? I have no idea. I feel like I may go a bit crazy this summer. I guess we'll find out.
But now for a quick game of dota. I have a lot of packing to finish up tomorrow before I checkout of Wiley at 3. It's ended so quickly, why does college have to be over?
Thursday, May 1, 2014
Finals, Running, and MTG
We had to create a Graphical User Interface, Video Demonstration, Updated Flow Charts, Updated Navigation Map (thing overall flow chart), a Power Point, and interview our direct users. I still have to interview my direct users tonight, as the final presentation of our GUI is tomorrow morning.
'
The meeting on Tuesday for the project was the most nightmarish. It went until 12:30 am Wednesday, a good 5.5 hours for me and more for the rest of my team who met earlier. Then our GUI still had a ton of bugs, which I learned a fix for on Wednesday morning after the project was due. Sigh. So now we are hopefully going to get a regrade based on the lovely effort I put in Wednesday morning during the remainder of our class time (class was let out an hour early) updating the method for passing variables. GUI's suck.
That said, I've remembered the reason I run/ran in high school. I love the nirvana after you run. The pain, the burn, the lovely everything about it. The feeling of satisfaction. Oh, everything. I ran five miles for the first time in forever yesterday, and boy did it feel good. I'm going to probably run just four this afternoon, I have an event this evening at 6:30 and some other stuff to attend to, so I only have time for a 30 to 40 minute run today.
JT's been having a bad time. I hate to see him so upset and it's really hard to communicate with him about it because we aren't in person and these are really tough times he's going through. His family is in a bad way right now and I have no idea what I can do to help him. Plus I have all these projects I'm trying to attend to and I don't have the time he wants from me right now. Ugh. I feel shitty, but I can't even comprehend how he must feel. JT, if you ever read this, I'm sorry I haven't been there. This summer will be a blast (hopefully!).
Anyway, I've been playing a lot of Magic the Gathering with Stephen, he's fueling my habit and encouraging me to engage once again in the arms race that is buying cards. I love it. God, I hope I don't end up being a high ranking military official in charge of the Pentagon's budget. I'd blow it all on cool planes and stuff.
Monday, April 21, 2014
My Problem with Focus
As I said earlier there are many, many things that require my undivided attention as well as even more things that would seek to throw me off. I am taking a break from my calculus homework to attend to this blog, surprise: its another distraction.
What's going on this week? Purdue's Grand Prix is happening. This means half of the campus has decided not to focus at all. Events are going on every night (every... single... night) and so not much work is getting done. That said, all of the freshmen engineers have an exam tomorrow. I can't engage even if I had an in to any of the socials going on this evening or the next. However, I may be able to attend events this weekend, so that is exciting. Something about foam pouring down from the ceilings.
I managed to climb my first V3 a couple of weeks ago. I was really proud, but I haven't managed to complete any others yet, though I am making good progress on my second one. Stephen didn't get the one I got though so that is a plus. My hands are sore due to a splinter I received playing hide-and-go-seek in the engineering mall so I have avoided the wall. I also am cowardly and haven't cut the damn thing out of my hand yet. Ugh, it twinges every now and then. If future me doesn't have a hand because of this, sorry (in advance).
Stephen and I have been playing a lot of Magic: The Gathering. When I say a lot, I mean its been almost every day. We duel with the prebuilt decks he owns, we duel with our standard decks, and I occasionally duel with my jank deck that I built from the crappy cards I own. While we are the only two who play frequently on our floor, Yu-Gi-Oh has been the game of choice among the other residents, thanks in part to my room-mates ridiculous collection of cards and decks.
Dota continues to play with my hopes and dreams. Every time I get ahead (I was recently positive by five or so games) I start to play badly or (in my most recent game) have terrible luck. We were winning until our Slardar decided that he didn't want to play anymore and starting feeding. Hard. He was doing ok too, just under-leveled. And all of a sudden he says "Fuck this, we need a surrender option. I am feeding." The game went to hell shortly after.
So that's my update for now. Not entirely focused but I think it was better written and more in depth than other posts I have completed. I think I'll aim to update this blog once or twice a week, that way I can write more without feeling like I am droning on and on and on and on...
Fin.
Friday, April 11, 2014
Lecture halls and cheap donuts
This was the result of a brilliant discovery that I was informed of. There is a student lounge with a coffee shop. It's brilliant.
Now I await my family arriving in from Chicago and this last lecture to be complete and life will be good.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Tuesday, April 8, 2014
Family visit!
mother to all of my college friends.
But first I have survive the exams I have scheduled for this evening and tomorrow evening. They are not going to be a cakewalk. Here's to surviving the week. Here's to family. Here's to college.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Thursday, April 3, 2014
Slackin'
I've discovered full metal alchemist. I like it a lot, Major Armstrong makes cry from laughing.
I am almost done milestone 6 for ENGR132. Cool beans.
My team for ENTR200 basically failed our presentation today.
I have no time to doto, though I want to badly.
Hope future me is happy. Bye.
Monday, March 31, 2014
Crunch time!
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Things to think about.
This may make little sense, but I have been able to put two (barely) coherent thoughts together since midnight: one, despite not drinking, I feel drunk. Two, I am lonely. Bah, that sounds sad and depressed. AND I STILL DID NOT FINISH MY CGT ASSIGNMENT. ALKFJ:LSAKFJ:ASLKFJASL:KFJ
that was a sad press of the keyboard. I just want to sleep ;(
I begin to crash
I have a few hours left to go in this evening and I have a lot of homework to do. I think I may simply attempt to finish most of it tonight, so that I can play all tomorrow. Not a bad thought, except I won't have time to play tomorrow because of engineering. Fuck. it. Also I have entrepreneurship, incidentally a word that I find very difficult to spell.
The sad thing is I am writing this at 12. I am pooped. I will be worse tomorrow, but ah well. Thus is the life. Time to make some tea and hopefully not pass out. Also I have to get my shirts and do laundry. Tomorrow (today) is going to suck.
CGT Notebooks
I reset all my devices though and now it seems to work. I'll take it over not completing this major assignment. GG homework.
Monday, March 24, 2014
My Deck
Sorcery (9)
- 1x Akroma's Vengeance
- 1x Armageddon
- 1x Breath of Life
- 1x Decree of Justice
- 1x Defy Death
- 1x Entreat the Angels
- 1x Resurrection
- 1x Sunscour
- 1x Wrath of God
Enchantment (11)
- 1x Angelic Accord
- 1x Angelic Renewal
- 1x Arrest
- 1x Ghostly Prison
- 1x Land Tax
- 1x Luminarch Ascension
- 1x Oblivion Ring
- 1x Pacifism
- 1x Recumbent Bliss
- 1x Serra's Blessing
- 1x Story Circle
Artifact (14)
Land (37)
- 1x Cavern of Souls
- 1x Emeria, The Sky Ruin
- 1x Mirrodin's Core
- 31x Plains
- 1x Seraph Sanctuary
- 1x Temple of the False God
- 1x Windbrisk Heights
Instant (6)
Creature (23)
- 1x Admonition Angel
- 1x Akroma, Angel of Wrath
- 1x Angel of Jubilation
- 1x Angel of Serenity
- 1x Angelic Arbiter
- 1x Angelic Skirmisher
- 1x Archangel of Thune
- 1x Avacyn, Angel of Hope
- 1x Baneslayer Angel
- 1x Chancellor of the Annex
- 1x Guardian Seraph
- 1x Herald of War
- 1x Iona, Shield of Emeria
- 1x Linvala, Keeper of Silence
- 1x Platinum Angel
- 1x Radiant, Archangel
- 1x Reya Dawnbringer
- 1x Serra Angel
- 1x Shattered Angel
- 1x Sublime Archangel
- 1x Sunblast Angel
- 1x Twilight Shepherd
- 1x Voice of All
Sideboard (10)
- 1x Archangel
- 1x Austere Command
- 1x Coldsteel Heart
- 1x Devout Invocation
- 1x Emancipation Angel
- 1x Emeria Angel
- 1x Evangelize
- 1x Flickering Ward
- 1x Harsh Mercy
- 1x Silence